2pm, no one parked for 100 feet from the entrance to the post office, I needed a stamp. One damn stamp. No customers in the post office, I even had the exact change. 60 seconds, max.
The area directly in front of the entrance is marked with a blue strip, meaning disabled parking only. I know that, I'm not stupid, or even all that evil. I'll help a little old lady cross the street, if I think there's a possibility of a tip.
So I pull up into the space you see in the photo below with the other law-breaking truck sitting.
Photo courtesy of Montana Historical Archives
I hop out, change in hand, leave the engine running and rush in, get my stamp, toss the letter in the bin and hurry out. That's when things went south.
As I sit and fasten my seat belt (law-abiding) I look up and see a parking enforcement person walking towards the front of the truck in the street. I've seen her before, we only have two after all. Mid-forties, blonde frizzy hair, with an orange vest that says "Parking Enforcement". I sigh inwardly and roll down the driver side window.
"Hi!" I say with a winning smile. She looks pointedly at the handicapped parking sign.
"I know" in my best winsome voice. "I swear, I wasn't in there even a minute, there were no other cars around...." my voice trails off under her accusatory look.
Finally she speaks. "I really should give you a ticket." she says. I sigh, thinking of my civic duty.
Then she leans against the driver side door and looks at me, arms folded on the top of the lowered window.
"Will you be sure not to park here again?" I nod alertly.
"Yes, it'll never happen again." I vow.
"Are you sure?" I nod quickly.
"Do you promise?" I may have frowned slightly, thinking this was venturing into the slightly-weird territory.
"Are you sure?" she repeats in a coy voice. I now realize I'm in odd terrain indeed.
"What do you want from me?" I ask in what might have been an exasperated voice.
This is when she takes a step back, and in a rush of words uses some expressions not often heard outside Marine Boot Camp. I believe the phrase 'asshole', 'fucking jerk' were some of the milder ones.
At this point I'm making a mental note to congratulate the local police for not arming the parking people.
"Do you often talk to the public like this?" I asked mildly. She turns on her heel and walks away.
Last night I checked twice to see the doors were locked before I retired.